"I wonder what's for dinner tonight?" "I want to do something fun this weekend!" "What am I going to do when these 4 months in Hawaii are over?"
I always catch myself looking into the future, whether it's a few hours ahead, a few months or even years. I love planning, I love thinking about an around the world trip and listing the countries and cities I want to see, planning my budget for when I'm back home and how I'll save for the next adventure. The problem with this is, I don't soak in the now. I don't sit and appreciate where I'm at in this moment.
People always say "God has a plan for you! He'll lead you into your next step" So I sit and anticipate where God is going to bring me next rather than sitting and being still of where I am already. What if where I am is where I am supposed to be? Could it be that I'm already there and I don’t even know it, be so focused on the future that I miss it here.
Looking into the future could be compromising what God has for me here in this moment..
"Be still and know that I am God." Psalm 46:10
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths." Proverbs 3:5-6
The amount of times my plans changed in the past couple years are uncountable. I had so many things that I planned for myself and then last minute was like 'just kidding' I'm off to do something else instead.
I'm learning more and more that God's timing is perfect, however I'm also learning he likes to wait till the very last minute.
As I'm sitting here living in Hawaii, I'm thinking about what I'm suppose to do next, am I going to come back here and staff long term? Am I going to do the bible core course in another location? Will my time with YWAM be done after this? Do I want to save for a year and travel the world or do I want to get a working holiday visa for another country and move all together. I have so many of these thoughts lingering through my head that I'm not even soaking in the fact that I live in Hawaii. I'm across the street from the beach, surrounded by acai shops, drinking tasty coffee daily and I'm not even appreciating it.
If God told me where I'd be at this time next year, it would be the only thing on my mind constantly, distracting me during my day to day life. If God told me 2 years ago what I'd experience in the past couple years, I probably wouldn't of wanted to stick around or tried to change it drastically but then I wouldn't of learnt anything and missed out on everything He was trying to teach me.
If you knew what you were going to go through whether it's good or bad, you'd either want to run away from it, wouldn't believe it, or sit and miss everything in the situation you're currently in. Take a moment a day, and think about where you're at, be thankful, journal about your day, how you feel and what you're going through.
There is something to take in everyday. Enjoy today and be still.